The Gold Coins

     This was all a plan to avoid the police catching the thief.  Then Margaret went to the flogger to talk to Claire and Claire invited her to her house at 7:00. That's the time when Claire comes from work.   After some hours looking at the coins they  (WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THESE TWO WORDS?) saw some dark gold coins so she looked carefully and asked Claire if she could take some coins to the police for an investigation. 

The next day there was another robed in the same store but the thiefs took a preshes red rubybut  when Mr. Terry entered the store he saw that the ruby was missing and that the glass was intact, so then Margaret went again to Claire to look around and saw a big dark red ruby. She asked Claire if she could take it for an investigation.  That same day the police started to rubbe the coins and the dark gold went off there were the coins, the had put paint on it so that they wount catcher(NOT CLEAR).

     When the police got the ruby they knew exactly what to do, it was the ruby, so the police went to Claire's house and arrested Claire.  She said that she HAD bought it to a woman kell the police asked if she had a bill and she noded so she went jail and the police if she could call the person how sold the coins and the ruby and in the other side she coul hear a man sayng  kelly Terry yes she answerd(RE WRITE. IDEAS ARE NOT CLEAR. RE READ AND INCLUDE PUNCTUATION AND CHECK SPELLING).  After hearing that, the police went to Miss. Terry's house and took her to the police and they asked why she HAD DONE THAT. She said that she wanted to earn more money and Kelly went to jail for six long years and the lived happy ever after. (CHOOSE ANOTHER ENDING MORE SUITABLE FOR A YEAR SIX STUDENT)

ON THE ONE HAND IT'S GOOD THAT YOU GOT STARTED ON THE EWATSON BUT I FEEL THIS WAS DONE IN A HURRY. RE READ AND CLARIFY YOUR IDEAS!

CHECK YOUR SPELLING MISTAKES. MISS ALE 30/03

JACK TWO WEEKS HAVE GONE BY AND YOU HAVEN'T RE CHECKED YOUR STORY. pLEASE DO SO! MISS ALE APRIL 16TH